Thursday, May 02, 2013

Painful Rant

Hello friends. Coming to you from home today where I am bound to be for some time. Yesterday I suffered an unfortunate event...leaving for work 15 minutes early my plan was to hit the store at the corner and grab myself a Starbucks refresher drink for work, and it was so beautiful outside I absent mindlessly pulled out and turned the opposite way into the parking lot at work. As I pulled into the parking spot I thought or darn I forgot to go get my drink. I was early to work so I had time to run back across the steet to get my drink and get back in plenty of time. As I was pulling out of the college parking lot I noticed that my favorite trees in the campus grounds had bloomed seemingly over night. I thought oh I want my camera...I stopped at the house grabbed my camera headed out the door to go to the store still having plenty of time for work and I took a fall in my front yard when I stepped down off of my porch step and landed wrong. I thought for sure I broke my leg and my other knee that was landed on was all banged up, my elbows and palms of my hands are scrapped. My neighbors as awesome as they are came out to my rescue after hearing my plea for help and called 911. I was taken via ambulance to the ER. I am in a cast on right leg from toe to knee and they are not sure if there are fractures or not due to the severe swelling. I was instructed to put no weight on the leg or foot under after I see a specialist with the cd of x rays they sent me with.
No morphine at home just Tylenol 3's which I really don't like to take I hate pills so I am trying to make myself not so much suffer as hold off until I cant take it anymore. Excuse my french but this sucks. I am use to being the care giver in my life. I do not sit still well and do not do well with needing others to do for me. Every experience comes with lessons I suppose and mine are there I think as I reflect on this today.
  1. Money does not rule over life and well being. While laid up in an ambulance and on 10mgs of morphine that was not even touching the pain (I swear) I was crying about missing work and what the fatal outcome would mean to my job and how much work would have to be missed. Worried about bills and what needed to be done that only I can do here. I'm learning fast...let it go. It will all work out the way God see's fit and I cant do anything about what I cant do.  This worrying makes me physically sick and it is like rocking in a rocking chair...it is something to do, but when you are done you have gone nowhere. I am a child of God and I am blessed and highly favored which means the best for me will be. 
  2. Accept help and love from others and focus on the good in this. My neighbor's, some that dont even know me or my name, RAN to help. Queen my next door neighbor God bless her soul, came out immediately and was screaming for Don who was not hearing me because he was in the bathroom when it happened. She stood right next to me the entire time and waited for help to get there. I love her. She has a heart of gold. When she is outside watering her flowers in the summer, she knows I work every day I come home to nice moist soil and perking flowers in my yard because she was kind enough to the pull the hose far enough to feed my flower beds. My dog tries to eat her dog every other day and she is still kind to him. Good soul she is and so thankful for her...the neighbor guy across the street RAN across the street with his 4-5 year old son. Without hesitation he reached down and touched my arm asked me what happened and said Im calling for help right now and dialed 911. He not only called for help but he asked me over and over can i get you anything or do anything for you to help you feel comfortable until they get here? His son I feared I would scare because the pain was so incredible I was crying and yelling out...not only did his presence help me to remain calm cause I did not want to scare him, but the sweet boy stayed on his knees talking to me the whole time saying " it is going to be okay" So last night, I sat here and made out cards for these individuals to ay thank you for their kindness and for them going out of their way to help me. so many people these days don't want to take the time to help others, or they assume someone else will. I'm so full of gratitude. I put a couple of bucks in the little boys card for him to get some candy or an ice cream and told him how much it means to others when someone is nice and to always be that way and how much he helped me and that I was thankful. Things like that can make a difference in how a child will act towards others when they grow up and that behavior should be noticed and rewarded. 
  3. Number three...learn to slow the hell down. I go, go, go, go, go. That is what I do. You either see me going, or see me thinking about going. I find my time so limited to do things like journal, or blog, or take a photo or work on things for my art group or other groups I am in because I am always very busy and I don't take time..to take time. Well, friends when you are in this routine the universe has a way of slamming on the breaks and forcing you to slow down and take notice of its authority.  I just wish that hard cement would not have been its choice of lessons for me this time around. Every thing on my entire body hurts. It hurts from the fall it hurts from the crutches...and I have no choice right now like it or not to sit, lay, sleep or write and make art. I will be off for the rest of the week at very least.  
I do not have a number 4 but I am SURE there are more lessons in this that I just dont know yet. So remember I mentioned that I came home to grab my camera. My Canon camera ( the expensive one)  was on my hands when I fell. I watched it beyond my control hit the ground and literally folks...tumble down the walk way 4-6 times. I thought for sure my camera was toast which would have been covered with insurance but still.. I got home last night and the first thing I wanted was my camera to access the damage done with it....friends not even one single scratch. Nothing. I wrote a formal letter to Canon last night as well telling them this is the story I will offer to people when they ask why I am Canon brand loyal!! I LOVE MY CAMERA!!!
And so...Here are my bones!
And so this may be the perfect time to create new banners for my photography page on FB, make some new buttons and work on some up coming big news I've been lacking time to get to!! 

Not very happy but trying to focus on these reflections and embrace the day come what may. That is really all any of us can do.

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